In a relationship, just like women have their moods, we men also have similar feelings too. Sometimes you feel like you are taking a break after spending loving and exciting time with your man. It doesn’t mean you want to break-up but you just feel a distance.

According to YourTango relationship experts, Melanie Gorman, relationship and communications expert Fiona Fine, author and relationship coach Gregg Michaelsen, matchmaker and dating Coach Jasbina Ahluwalia and biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, Ph.D., these ‘authorities’ see this as actually quite common behaviour between men and women in relationships. It could actually be your partner’s way of reinforcing your bond they say!

Here are two top but surprising reasons men and women decide to create distance from their partners even though the relationship is going well:

  1. He’s Low On Testosterone: Men and women bond to their partners differently. Jasbina Ahluwalia explains the confusing bonding phenomenon like this – “Men tend to have this intense bonding. Women are de-stressing. The bonding is making them de-stress. [It’s the] opposite for the guys. Actually, their testosterone is coming down, so they need to actually go away, pull back, and build it up. They’ll spring back, too, as per John Gray’s Rubberband Theory. They’ll spring back to you as long as you don’t chase him, right? Don’t chase him. He’ll come back.”


  1. He’s Realizing That He’s Leaving The Single Life Behind: It’s a big transition from, I’m single and ready to mingle to I’m in a wonderful relationship with this one woman (I felt that way with my woman initially). That can be jarring for a man, which is why when a woman comes around that seems to be worth it, they take a step back to understand their feelings and determine whether she’s worth giving up the single life. “We think three things,” says Gregg Michaelson, “…I’m not always proud of this. But we think, she’s going to take all my money. She’s going to take away all my friends, and I’ll never be able to sleep with another woman again. And we think about this, and the irony is we want to spend our money on women. We want our friends to be taken away to a certain extent (at least some of them), and we want to only sleep with one woman. But it’s up to the woman to neutralize [those three fears].”

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